Current Mood: Angry

You give birth to the most beautiful child in the world. You give your child everything they could ever desire. You let them explore their surroundings. You stand up for them when you feel they have been wrongly accused. YOUR little beast angel wouldn’t do such a thing!

Wrong. Ever wonder why people stare at your kid while they are “exploring”? Because your kid is running around, getting into everything, bothering others, and generally being a little hellion. And because you choose to ignore it, they will only get worse. Perhaps if you’d unplug your cell phone from your head and pay attention to them they would be better behaved. Perhaps if you didn’t stuff them full of sodium-laden fast food and sugar-laden soda and sweets they would be better behaved. Whaaaa? Yeah. Click those links. They were pretty easy to search, just plug a few key terms  into your favorite search engine. Go on, try it.

Now before you get your panties in a wad, yes, I will acknowledge that there are a lot of behavioral problems that children have. I have a super duper ADHD kid myself. To the point of it being a disability, thanks for asking. But you know what? He’s pretty well-behaved in public. You know why? Because we don’t allow him to run amok, talk loudly, and generally cause a scene, as he would do if we didn’t constantly monitor him and correct him as the warning signs of an episode arise. Yes, children have behavioral problems. Yes, they act out when they aren’t monitored, such as at school. I’m saying in general.

Let me share a story to illustrate: We were at a restaurant (a rare treat out for us), and there was a child climbing all over the back of a booth. It was one of those round corner booths with the triangular shape on the back. He’d climb on it and jump off onto siblings, climb under the table and run around, and was just being a generally rotten kid. As most people were studiously ignoring, I stared with disbelief. Not so much at the kid, but at the parents who were allowing this behavior. The family was ignoring it almost as much as the other patrons. Seriously? Do you think this is appropriate behavior? You are free tell your 8 year old, “Sit down and eat your food. If you are finished, you are welcome to color, but we do not act out in public.” As they were leaving, the woman hissed at me “My son is autistic!” That was all it took. She was using his diagnosis as a cure-all for his poor behavior. Don’t get me wrong, autism is difficult to deal with, both as an parent and as a child. But as a parent, it is our responsibility to teach our children how to be normal human beings functioning members of society; even moreso with having such a diagnosis. Instead, this child was given the green light to do as he pleased because he was tagged with autism. I have a dear friend who has a son with autism. He’s a very good kid, and well behaved in public. Not because his autism is any better than the kid who was going wild, but because she taught her son how to act, and how to handle his impulses. I told her about this kid and she just shook her head at the ignorance of the parents. I could speak volumes on it, but I’m done.

So, because you’re so busy with your own life your career, you don’t have time to make a nutritious meal for your kid, so you hit the drive thru. Yet another greasy meal in your kid’s stomach, paired with a sugary soda. I linked above to the health hazards of this crap you’re feeding to your children. Not only is this incredibly unhealthy for your child, not to mention an expensive habit, it also teaches your child to rely on external sources for food, and that it’s okay to be too lazy to cook. It also teaches them that instant gratification is cool, which I feel is a huge part of today’s children’s behavioral problems.
I’m not saying that fast food is bad. Hey, we do fast food. However, fast food is only served on rare occasion; maybe twice a month. And then it is served when we are truly on the go, hence “fast” food. We also let it be known that we are having fast food because it suits the situation, versus “Meh, I don’t want to make supper tonight.” If we are just going to be out for the day, we will pack lunches. $15-20 in fast food can translate to an incredible picnic lunch! This carries over into daily life too… Everyone takes their lunch to work or school. It’s cheaper and healthier than any slop that you can get when you’re away from home.

“When I have kids, I’m going to give them everything I didn’t have.”  Common phrase, and a noble one. It often shows a potential parent’s determination to provide well for their child, which is very good, indeed. However, this sometimes translates into giving into a child’s every whim and desire. As they grow up, they are catered to like little princes and princesses. And that’s just what they are going to act like… Little royalty that expect everyone to give everything to them, just because they demand it. This, coupled with the fast food, I believe is one of the major reasons that we have so many obese children, along with… inactivity. Kids don’t play outside. They don’t ride bikes. Part of this is due to our society’s paranoia over the crazies in the world, but mostly it’s due to parental laziness of not wanting to tend to their child while they are participating in an outdoor activity. Thus we get lazy little video game zombies.

Again, video games have their place. They are great amusement and downtime for children. They attain goals and develop fine motor coordination, as well as problem solving. Some even teach them to socialize. So I’m not putting down the video game, but too much of a good thing isn’t necessarily good.

So, to get to the root of it all: I honestly believe that we, as parents, spend entirely too much time providing things to our children that they may not necessarily need, and work way too many hours to go above and beyond what is needed. Yep, I said it. Take some time off. If your family can afford to lose some income, do it. Pull your kid out of the societal machine that’s raising them and be a parent to them. Get the phone out of your ear, tell the bosses that when you’re off work you aren’t working (what a concept!), and spend time with your kid. Play a game. Go to the park. Learn to cook something. Your children need you. Raise  your kids to be a respectable member of society, not horrid little cretins.

And if you’re interested in the word count: 1188.